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into my hair and rocked his forehead against mine as if he were tormented with the
decision. Oh God, why was he holding back, kiss me now. In one last second of restraint,
he bit his lower lip then released it and pressed it onto my mouth, sucking and twisting
my lips into a hot moist kiss of the most delectable kind.
When he stopped and pulled back, we were breathing heavily, wound up tight as a
spring by the raw tension firing back and forth between us. This was not how I saw this
happening, he whispered.
Oh. Was it that bad of a kiss?
I can t do this. Eyes that had flashed with passion were now clouded with
confusion. He stepped back and held me at arm s length. He looked at me with a guarded
expression, of distrust. What the fuck? What was he so afraid of? Was he married or
something?
Of course, here it comes. The you are really great but I have a wife back in New
York speech. I should have checked his ring finger for a tan line. John, what do you
mean? You are confusing me.
Sorry. I didn t mean to kiss you. We shouldn t ... He turned and started walking
back toward the restaurant.
Why this reaction to a kiss? Something in my gut told me it wasn t a wife, or a
girlfriend. Maybe I was about to make a fool of myself, but my heart didn t care. It
ordered my feet to start moving and I rushed to catch up with him. Tell me what s
wrong, John? We just shared a mind blowing kiss and you walked away from me. What s
up?
I can t tell you. I m really sorry. It s not you, it s me.
I grabbed him by the shoulder and forced him to stop. It s not you, it s me? Are you
kidding me? Who is being cliché now?
A soft smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. You re right. It was mind blowing
and more. You re an amazing woman. That s why I can t do this. If we continue, I won t
be able to stop. Hanna, I m not good for you.
I m not looking for good right now.
He blew out a breath and raked his fingers through his hair. Trust me on this,
Hanna. You draw me in like no one else. I want to let go and embrace this, but I know
what will happen when there is this much heat. Someone will get burned. I am afraid I
will hurt you if I allow myself to give in to you.
He faced me completely and lowered his voice to a warm hum as he stroked my
hair. You re beautiful and I like being with you, but I don t want to take advantage of
you, because I& I shouldn t. I am.
Without another word, I pulled his head towards me and kissed him again. This time
it was hard, smoldering and filled with pure lust and passion. My heart raced and my
entire being vibrated with a pleasant buzz. If this was wrong, I didn t care. I wanted this
feeling and I wanted more. Whatever consequences the next day would bring, were of no
concern to me right now. John s lust for me read red hot on the dial and if this was the
path to hell, then at least getting there would be one fiery, hell of a ride. I felt his rock
solid abs as he held me pressed to his chest. Listen, John, I m a big girl. Let me be the
judge of whether you re good for me or not. With such strong arms wrapped around me,
it wasn t difficult to make my decision. I felt safe in his embrace. I ve already reached my
verdict.
And& ?
It s yes, I have a gut feeling that you re very good for me and I m going to take a
leap of faith, so tonight you re mine. Don t run out on me, John. You don t get to do that.
Not tonight.
Do you always get what you want?
I already told you, didn t I? When I see something I want, I take it.
He leaned in and our lips met for another kiss. He pulled me harder against his
chest then away slightly, just enough to reach his hand between us to touch my breast.
He pushed and squeezed over the intrusive fabric of my summer top as he deepened his
kiss. The weight in my body seemed to shift. At once I felt lighter, then too heavy for my
legs to support and my knees weakened. His fingers roamed to the edge of my top,
tugging and prying at the hem, anxious to feel the flesh that was underneath all this
clothing.
I grabbed his hand that was fondling my breast and squeezed it tight, enticing him
to go farther, but then I pulled back. Not here, I said. My voice came out breathy and
raspy. Your house? I swallowed hard and took a breath.
He nodded in silence as if consumed by a heady lust and shoved both of his hands
down my back side, cupping my ass in his hands. He licked his lips and with one last kiss,
he thrust his hips into mine, grinding his answer into my pelvis. I wanted to rip the
clothes off that lay between us and feel his skin against mine, feel his wet kisses run
down my neck. I grabbed his hand and pulled him along as I dug my bare feet into the
piles of soft sand that lay between us and the restaurant where we had left his bike
parked.
Chapter 13
I leaned my chest into John s back as we rode the short distance to his beach house
rental. I stroked his upper body with my hands from behind, wallowing in the sea of
hormones that swirled within my body. The engine of the bike vibrated and my body
hummed with it, as a warm fuzzy feeling build inside of me. The vibrations I felt through
the seat of the bike added to the tingle that was beginning to build between my legs. I
held John tightly as we drove. I wanted to lay my head on his shoulder, but our
motorcycle helmets prevented it. The anticipation of seeing him lying naked on the bed,
revealing those sculpted muscles that had been teasing me with shadowed glimpses
through his clothes, excited me to my core and the moisture in my mouth increased in
response. It didn t take long before he stopped his bike in front of a small bungalow, two
blocks from the beach.
I thought you said you didn t like the beach?
He smiled warmly and took the helmet from my hands. I said I didn t like wasting
my time tanning on a towel down at the beach. I love the sound of the ocean.
Of course. I nodded.
He hung the spare helmet on the back rest of the bike and extended an open hand.
His blue eyes were burning a hole through me, and he twisted his head to watch me as
we walked side by side to the front step. The beach house was a typical vacation house,
a cozy front porch bedecked in potted geraniums and a wooden porch rocker built for two.
So quaint, so cozy& so not his style.
I took his hand as he led me inside. Were we going to tear each other s clothes off
before we even got to the bedroom? He let my hand drop from his and headed toward
the kitchen.
Can I get you anything to drink?
I stood frozen in the middle of the small living room and turned slowly as my eyes
made a radar sweep of the room and its décor. If the outside of the house was not his
style, the inside was totally not his style. It was definitely a buzz kill. This place looked
like Martha Stewart on steroids had thrown up in here. That itchy, little feeling of doubt
prickled inside of me and my mood down shifted to low.
Sure, a glass of wine if you have it.
He smiled. How about a beer?
Great.
He handed me a cold Bud Light, which I imagined was probably the only inhabitant
of his refrigerator and we sat down on the couch. I took a sip. So, what s up with the
female touch in your decorating?
John laughed, nearly spilling his beer. Don t worry. I don t have a secret girlfriend
stashed here and I m not gay either. I rented this house furnished.
Yeah, I was a little worried about a girlfriend stashed somewhere, but that would
explain it. I twisted a lock of hair between my fingers.
John set his beer down on the end table and took my hand in his. His deep blue
eyes searched mine. Hanna, you are amazing. You are honest and straightforward.
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